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Still Showing Up. Still Strong.
So no, I’m probably not going to explain my energy levels today. Or tomorrow. Or maybe ever again. I’ve tried, and most people just don’t get it. They think being “a little run down” is the same thing. It’s not. And honestly, I’m learning to use what little energy I have on compassion and care, for myself this time. Not for explaining.
I’m out here running a business. Managing projects. Hitting deadlines. Keeping humans alive. Being the backup plan. Showing up for everyone else even when I’m running on fumes. Being kind.
Still being kind.
But I don’t have it in me anymore to play translator for something people don’t want to understand. I can’t keep putting myself last just so someone else can feel more comfortable with the fact that I’m tired. Before I even open my laptop? No. That energy’s going somewhere better now.
Now I use it to make a real breakfast. To sit on the floor with my dog for five extra minutes before the day starts. To actually pause between tasks. To cry when I need to, instead of pretending I don’t. To notice when I’m hurting and see it as a sign my body’s asking for a little extra love. To do a tiny stretch before bed. Light a candle for no reason. Scroll less. Breathe more. Say no.
Just…say no.
We’ve all had to dig deep, not once or twice, but over and over again. We’ve built a kind of strength most people never even have to tap into. And now I’ve found this community where that strength isn’t invisible! Where we’re seen as capable people who keep showing up anyway.
Share what shifts you’re making to turn this journey into one that cares for you. I’d love to hear it. Just know it matters. You matter. The more we speak it, the more real it becomes. And maybe then, the world will start to see us as the forces we truly are.
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This discussion was modified 3 weeks, 6 days ago by
Anji.
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This discussion was modified 3 weeks, 6 days ago by
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2 Replies
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I don’t even know how to respond to this without getting all weird and emotional—so instead I’m just going to say this made me cry a little (in a good way?) and now I’m sitting here, covered in crumbs, nodding way too hard.
The line about not using energy to explain anymore? Yeah. That.
Thank you for writing this. It made something click. I needed that today. I’ll probably reread it like three more times before logging off.
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Ahh, this means the world. Honestly, I wasn’t sure if anyone would get that part—but you really did. Thank you for sitting in it with me (crumbs and all). Sending you a quiet little fist bump from across the screen. I hope it keeps clicking in the best way.
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